I love vampires. I really do., and this year we have had the brilliant Sinners already. So when I saw that Abraham’s Boys was a fresh new take on the classic Van Helsing/Dracula lore, I was excited.
But by the halfway mark, I was seriously considering whether organizing my spice rack would be more engaging than this movie.
Plot Summary of Abraham’s Boys (Spoiler-Free)
Abraham’s Boys picks up years after the events of the classic Dracula tale. The legendary vampire hunter Abraham Van Helsing is now living in seclusion somewhere in the U.S. with his two sons, Max and Rudy.
He’s trying to leave his vampire-hunting days behind and start fresh. But of course, trauma doesn’t just disappear, especially when you’ve spent a good chunk of your life fighting bloodsucking creatures of the night.
The film focuses on the tension in this family unit. The boys slowly begin to unravel the truth about their father’s past, which he’s done a pretty terrible job of hiding, honestly. While Abraham tries to maintain a normal home life, it becomes pretty clear that the shadow of his past (and Dracula himself) never really left.
And that’s it, really. Not much else happens. You think there’s going to be a twist or at least some kind of pulse-pounding showdown, but the film plays it so straight and slow that you start to wonder if it’s more drama than horror. Or worse, just kinda neither.
Abraham’s Boys Review: Is It Worth Watching?
Abraham’s Boys is a movie that tries really hard to be haunting and serious, but ends up just being… kind of boring. I wanted to like it. I tried to like it. But when a vampire movie forgets to be scary or even mildly tense, you’ve got a problem.
Let me be clear: this is not a badly made film. It looks nice. It sounds nice. It has the kind of atmosphere you’d expect from a slow-burn horror film. And there are moments that work. Titus Welliver as Abraham Van Helsing has this quiet menace about him that hints at a far more interesting movie buried beneath the surface. But the story never finds its rhythm. It just kind of floats along, waiting for something to happen.
The pacing is where this thing absolutely flatlines. For a 90-ish minute movie, it felt twice as long. It’s filled with slow, cryptic conversations between Abraham and his sons that are supposed to build suspense but mostly made me want to check how much longer I had left. I’m not against slow burns, far from it, but this film takes the piss.
There’s also a serious lack of emotion across the board. Everyone talks in this weird, flat, almost robotic tone like they were told to act like they’re in a dream sequence. I couldn’t connect to any of them. I didn’t believe their relationships. I didn’t care who lived, who died, or what they had for dinner.
And the horror? It’s barely there. There’s some decent blood-related stuff involving medical equipment that might make squeamish viewers squirm, and one scene near the end with some actually satisfying gore. But overall, this is a vampire movie where the vampires are practically MIA and the blood budget seems to have gone into fog machine rentals instead.
But here’s what really frustrated me. There’s a good movie in here. Or at least a good idea. A father that is trying to bury the horrors of his past while it leaks into his children’s lives could have been quite interesting. But it never dives deep enough into any of it. The movie hints at heavy ideas but never commits to them.
And don’t even get me started on the final act. When things finally start to heat up, it’s incredibly rushed. You spend over an hour watching these characters tiptoe around the truth, only for the climax to just kind of stumble in, do a little wave, and disappear., and the film ends right when it feels like it should’ve started.
Disappointing.
What I liked (And What I Didn’t like)
Pros
The Core Concept Was Solid
The idea of Van Helsing’s sons discovering their father’s dark past is actually a cool concept. It flips the typical vampire story and adds a personal, generational twist. There’s a lot you could do with that setup, you just have to, you know, do it.
Titus Welliver as Abraham Van Helsing
Welliver brings this controlled, quiet energy to Abraham that carries most of the film. He’s stern, haunted, and clearly hiding something, and you believe that he’s seen some stuff. Unfortunately, he doesn’t get much to do, but he was convincing in every scene.
Some Nice Visuals
The film looks great. It’s shot with a moody, atmospheric style that fits the tone. You can tell they put effort into the cinematography. The house feels isolating and cold, and the flashbacks are visually distinct, even if they don’t add much.
The Father/Son Conflict
The emotional core between Max and Abraham could’ve been great. Their final confrontation hints at the story that should’ve been told all along. It’s messy and complicated, and had it been developed more, this movie would have felt way more impactful.
Cons
The Pacing is a Disaster
This movie moves at the speed of drying paint. Every scene drags. You keep waiting for something big to happen, and it just doesn’t. By the time the story finally picks up, it’s already lost you.
The Dialogue is Too On-the-Nose
There’s very little nuance in how the story is told. The characters say exactly what they’re feeling or thinking, and it all sounds weirdly scripted. There’s no room for natural, believable conversations.
The Sons Aren’t Memorable
Max and Rudy are pretty one-note. I wanted to root for them, but they felt more like plot devices than real characters. They react to things, but never really grow.
No Real Vampire Presence
The film is more about the mythos. There’s hardly any threat, no real fear, and definitely no bite (pun fully intended).
Emotionally Flat
For a movie about trauma and secrecy, it sure doesn’t feel very emotional. Everyone’s so stoic and deadpan, I half expected one of them to be a robot.
Wasted Potential
This is the big one. There’s a good story in here, maybe even a great one. But it’s buried under poor pacing, underwritten characters, and a lack of commitment to the horror genre.
Who might like Abraham’s Boys
- Fans of slow, character-driven dramas
- Viewers who enjoy indie, minimalist horror aesthetics
Who might dislike Abraham’s Boys
- Vampire fans looking for blood, fangs, and action
- Anyone who hates slow pacing
- Viewers expecting a traditional horror film
- Fans of strong character arcs or emotional depth
- People who want more than 10 minutes of actual plot movement
Final Verdict: Did I Enjoy Watching Abraham’s Boys?
Not particularly. I was bored, and that’s a worse crime for a movie. There were some decent moments and a strong performance from Welliver, but they were buried under too much slow-moving nothingness.
It felt like a film that was scared to go big, and as a result, it plays everything safe and ends up feeling kind of lifeless.
If you’re really into the Dracula mythos and have the patience of a saint, you might find something worthwhile here.
It had potential, and, but potential doesn’t matter if you don’t use it. And Abraham’s Boys just never sunk its teeth in.
We have a good interesting film waiting to come out from it all somewhere, it just wasn’t this.
Final Rating: 4/10
Abraham’s Boys Trailer
Simon Leasher
A lover of cinema for over 35 years, I have watched many films from around the world in many different genres, yet I still normally always come back to trashy slasher horror films when in doubt. More
And yes, The Godfather 2 is better than The Godfather.
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